SheBrews: The Hunt For Grace

As the temperatures have begun to dip and whisper of the coming of winter, the aurora borealis put on a show last night. I stood in awe for the second time this year as I witnessed the majesty of the Lord on such great display. But even as I enjoyed the array of bright colors—the ballet of light in the night sky—I felt an ache settling into my joints. A familiar ache that reminds me that, while I love the holiday season of November through December, I simultaneously dislike it because as the temperatures cool off, my joint pain increases.

Pain that is, once again, of an unknown cause.

I was diagnosed with non-radiographic axial spondyloarthritis earlier this year. It was supposed to be the answer to every mysterious symptom I had experienced over the last four and a half years. Only it wasn’t. My doctor admitted that it was more of a band-aid diagnosis than an actual answer. And after consulting a second doctor today, it’s been determined that whatever my condition is, it is more likely neurological than rheumatological. So, I’m back to square one—waiting to see what happens next. Waiting for my next MRI. Waiting for answers.

While I’m thankful that I’m not headed down the wrong path of a diagnosis and that this new doctor is willing to try a new medication to help ease some of my pain, I’m also discouraged. It’s crazy to me that I still have no concrete answers after so many years. It’s crazy to me that I’m about to enter another winter of pain, without knowing the root cause.

So this week’s SheBrews topic is timely for me, because we’re going to talk about the shifting of our perspective in trials.

Hebrews 1:3, in talking about Jesus, says, “He is the radiance of the glory of God and the exact imprint of His nature, and He upholds the universe by the word of His power.” He is the radiance of God and upholds the universe. He upholds the earth and the northern lights we had the gift of seeing the other night. And after witnessing such an incredible display of power—a very small glimpse of His radiance—it is even more awe-inspiring to think about how He became man for us for the purpose of suffering.

Hebrews 10:5-7 – “Consequently, when Christ came into the world, He said, ‘Sacrifices and offerings You have not desired, but a body have You prepared for Me; in burnt offerings and sin offerings You have taken no pleasure. Then I said, “Behold, I have come to do Your will, O God, as it is written of Me in the scroll of the book.”’”

Hebrews 2:9-10 – “But we see Him who for a little while was made lower than the angels, namely Jesus, crowned with glory and honor because of the suffering of death, so that by the grace of God He might taste death for everyone. For it was fitting that He, for whom and by whom all things exist, in bringing many son to glory, should make the founder of their salvation perfect through suffering.”

Those are surprising statements. “So that by the grace of God He might taste death for everyone.” “It was fitting that He…should make the founder of their salvation perfect through suffering.”

We know that grace was extended to us through the death of Jesus, but how striking is the composition of that phrase and the following statement? Grace and purpose were intricately woven throughout the suffering Jesus faced. Maybe, then, we should ask ourselves if there could be grace and purpose intricately woven throughout our own suffering? No, we are not here to suffer for the sake of reconciling God and man. But the whole of the Bible has made it clear that we are to look to Christ and His life as an example for our own lives. So, it’s only right that we start to consider that maybe God is extending grace towards us in our suffering.

And that’s where I want to leave you this week. If you’re walking through something difficult, I would encourage you to spend this next week asking God if He is weaving grace through the story of your pain. And I want you to ask yourself, “Do I want to find this grace more than I want to escape this pain?”

Because this is the example Christ provided for us.

Hebrews 10:7 – “Then I said, ‘Behold, I have come to do Your will, O God, as it is written of Me in the scroll of the book.’”

Matthew 26:39 & 42 – “And going a little farther He fell on His face and prayed, saying, ‘My Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from Me; nevertheless, not as I will, but as You will.’…Again, for the second time, He went away and prayed, ‘My Father, if this cannot pass unless I drink it, Your will be done.’”